I am going off topic because I have had a lot of people ask me what I did to keep busy over my parental leave. I am not built to be a stay-at-home mom; I like having things to do, schedules to keep, etc. Any time anyone asks what to do in Toronto, people tend to point to Ontario Early Years Centres, which are great resources, but if you have no idea what they are, the information available online is pretty lacking. So I'm going to talk about what I did - no ratings, but just providing information that (hopefully) is a bit more useful than what you might find from the website. I'll try to break it down into groupings, but yes, this is going to be a long post.
Ontario Programs
Let's start here - the province offers amazing resources. Best of all, they are all free (or rather, if you paid your taxes, you've already paid for them)!
Healthy Babies Healthy Children
Ontario Early Years Centres
This is the place that everyone on parental leave will tell you to go. You can find information on the Ontario website, but as a new mom doing research, I found that this did not tell me what to expect. OEYCs have registered and drop-in programs for families. Some programs are for specific age groups - I've seen 0-12 months, 0-18 months, 0-6 years, 6-12 months, and more. Some of the registered programs I talk about later are run in OEYCs. No two OEYCs are alike, so I recommend you go to more than one. Information online is pretty scarce, so use the link to find the ones nearest you and give them a call to ask when the baby programs are. Typically, what you can expect is some time to socialize with other parents while your baby plays with toys, and then there might be a speaker about topics like dental health, sleep, introducing solids, homeopathy, etc., or there might be an activity like sensory stations, bubble wrap painting, or baby handprints. At some point, there is usually circle time, which is when all the caregivers and babies sit in a circle and sing songs, tell stories, or read books. Some OEYCs provide snacks for the caregivers and/or the babies. It's a great way to meet others, discuss concerns, socialize your baby, and get access to other resources. Drop-in programs mean that there is no commitment to go every week. If you go to one and you don't like it, I recommend trying another one before writing them off - I found there was one OEYC that my son felt extremely comfortable in, and another one that he never really warmed up to.
Toronto Public Health
The city runs some great parenting programs, and you can learn about them on the City of Toronto website. All programs run by Toronto Public Health provide TTC tokens, and they are run all over the city so you need to call to register for one close to you.
Living and Learning with Baby
LLB is a 6 week program for those with children 6 weeks-6 months. It is run by a Toronto Public Health nurse to talk about adjusting to parenthood. Each week covers a new topic about things like safety, child sickness, development, etc. It's a great way to ask specific questions to a health care professional, especially when the Internet has so much conflicting information. It's also good to hear what questions other people have - as a new mom, I didn't always know what to ask, and I'm a bit introverted so I liked to listen to others talk.
Making the Connection
This program is for 0-1 year, and the goal is to help you connect with your baby. There are no toys because the idea is that you are your baby's favourite toy. They teach you how to have "magic moments" with your baby, and you are given a photo album to fill with pictures of you interacting with your baby, comforting your baby, singing to your baby, soothing to your baby, etc. During the program, they take a video of you interacting with your baby and then you watch it as a group and talk about what you did that helped connect you with your baby. I have to be honest: this was my least favourite program. I kept going because I met some great people, but I don't like watching myself on video and it just seems a bit weird to me. If this seems like your thing, by all means, go for it.
Peer Nutrition Program
PNP has a separate link because it's considered a nutrition program rather than a parenting program. This is for caregivers of children 6 months-6 years and teaches you how to prepare nutritious meals for your baby and toddler. You also learn how to read Canada's Food Guide, how to read nutrition information, and how to budget for groceries. Child minding is available, which I liked because it helped me prepare my baby for day care once my parental leave was up. Once you complete the program, you receive a $50 food voucher and you also have access to a support site twice a month for up to a year. The support sites teach you other things like composting, growing your own plants, and positive discipline. You also get to take home a box of fresh fruits and vegetables once a month. As someone who doesn't know how to cook, I really liked getting some easy and nutritious recipes that I could make for my family. This program is available in different languages also, so for example, if you speak Cantonese and you want to learn how to make Chinese recipes, you can let them know when you register, as Toronto is such a diverse city that they are able to accommodate.
Nobody's Perfect
I really liked Nobody's Perfect. This is a registered program for caregivers of children 0-6 years old. You get a set of books with the following topics: Mind, Body, Safety, Behaviour, and Parents. Each week you discuss a different book, and it really helps you to learn how to raise your child with good mental health as well as take care of your child and yourself. I recommend this program after you've done the other programs, because for me, the other programs helped me feel confident that I could keep my baby alive, whereas this one helps me to cope with his behaviour in a positive way (my upbringing was much more authoritative, and while I think I turned out okay, there is definitely a permanent impact on my self esteem). Child minding is also available for this one, although they recently changed the rules to say that they cannot provide child care for kids under 1 year, so for the second half of the program I had to keep my baby in the room with me. Luckily, everyone was very understanding and accommodating, so this was not an issue for me.
Other Free Programs
Toronto Public Library
Check your local library! A lot of libraries have a Ready for Reading program, whether it is Baby Time or Family Time. It is a half hour circle time, where the leader reads books and sings songs. It is a great way to expose your baby to books, as it is never too early! Your baby can also get a library card right away, and you'd be surprised how many board books are available to borrow. Also, if you have a valid library card, you can borrow the Museum and Arts Pass (MAP), which gives you free admission for up to two adults and five children to a variety of places around the city, including the Royal Ontario Museum, the Toronto Zoo, and the Art Gallery of Ontario. If there are other free programs in the city, they are often advertised at the library as well.
La Leche League
I had heard about La Leche League but didn't actually attend a session until my son was 9 months old. I really wish I had attended sooner. If you are breastfeeding your baby, you want to go to these meetings. Obviously, this is specifically targeted at mothers rather than parents and caregivers. Each week there is a set topic on breastfeeding, but it's not fixed, so if you have any questions about breastfeeding at all, you can bring it up. The group is made up of new moms, experienced moms, and moms-to-be. I don't recommend attending when you are still pregnant, because some of the stories might sound a little scary, and let's be realistic, you aren't going to remember the useful stuff when the baby is born. It's a great resource to talk about latch issues, nutrition, pumping, going back to work, or even just venting frustrations. There was no judgment at the group I participated in - some moms supplemented with formula, and that's okay. If you are having trouble with breastfeeding, of course I'd say the first step is to see a lactation consultant, but after that, this is an excellent support group for the rest of your breastfeeding journey.
The Parent-Child Mother Goose Program
The PCMGP is a registered program where you learn different songs and rhymes to share with your baby. At the end of the program, you receive a songbook with everything that you learned throughout the session. If you want to sing to your baby but don't like singing the same songs over and over again, this is a great resource to learn some new songs and rhymes that are a little less common. I must admit that, given all the songs I've learned in other programs, this wasn't really necessary for me, and some of the things I learned were actually really weird. I met some great people through this program, though, and some of the other parents were really into it. Given that it's free, it's worth it for you to check it out and see how you like it.
Handle With Care
If you are concerned about how to raise your baby to promote mental health, Handle With Care is an excellent program. It is a registered program where you are taught strategies, best practices, and problem solving skills to build a strong foundation for your baby's self esteem. I attended this through an OEYC that ran this specifically for babies, although the program is typically for caregivers of children 0-6 years. Some of the things we did admittedly felt, to me, like a waste of time (for example, we had to create a mobile with coloured beads to represent happy memories that remind us of how much we love our baby), but other things were extremely useful (I would never have known the importance of communicating to my baby before he is old enough to understand). I can't promise that your kid will grow up with absolutely no mental health issues, but as a parent, I want to know that I am doing everything I can to prevent them.
Stepping Stones
I suspect that I have the totally wrong link for Stepping Stones, but if you are like me and you are particularly focused on your baby's mental health, this registered program specifically addresses dealing with your child's behaviour. The link starts at early adolescence but the group I attended were caregivers of children between 0-6 years old. While Handle With Care focused more on setting the stage early, Stepping Stones felt like the focus was on dealing with negative behaviour today and understanding what tools we have without relying on archaic and disproven models of child neglect or abuse.
Paid Programs
The city is full of parent and baby programs that you can register and pay for. The good news is that the majority of these allow you to take a trial class, so you can test it out to see if it's worth investing in the full registration. I am listing these in order of price point (lowest to highest), but depending on specific classes and locations, prices may vary.
Toronto Parks & Rec
There are a lot of city programs available through Toronto Parks & Recreation. I took my son to the Joseph J. Piccininni Community Centre, which has tons of great prenatal and post-natal programs. Specifically, I enrolled him in Jump & Play with Caregiver, which was great because they set up the entire gymnasium with baby friendly things like an obstacle course, a trampoline, some push cars, blocks, and musical instruments. The city programs are actually quite cheap (approximately $40 for 9 weeks), and some locations have free registered programs too. In my experience, though, they don't give you a lot of directions, so if you are looking to put your baby in swimming lessons and you are a nervous swimmer (that's me!), you might want to pay more for a more specialized class.
Stars and Strollers
Not a registered program, but Cineplex has something called Stars & Strollers at select theatres. You get to go see a movie where the volume is a bit lower and the lights are not so dim, and you get $2 off general admission. There is stroller parking available and a change table is brought into the theatre. Some parents bring the car seat and place it in a seat next to them, while others put out a blanket in the aisle for babies to play. It's a great way to go and see a new movie in theatres without feeling guilty about your baby crying and disturbing other moviegoers. To be clear, these are not movies for babies. These are movies for you. I personally saw X-Men: Apocalypse, Ghostbusters, and La La Land with my baby. If you are worried about screen time for your baby, I suggest you go when your baby is very young, as my son slept through the first movie and half of the second. If you bring a blanket and some toys, your baby might be occupied enough to not care about the screen, or you can meet another mom and give your baby an impromptu play date while you enjoy the movie. I never had a problem, and I love seeing new movies in theatres, so I really appreciated this.
Belly Bootcamp
I did a trial class of Belly Bootcamp and found that the workout was really great, and it was a great way to meet people, but it wasn't my favourite class. The focus is completely on the mommy, while the babies either sit on blankets or crawl around, depending on their age. If you needed to stop and change or feed your baby, that was totally fine, so I definitely felt very welcome being part of the class, but personally I had a better experience elsewhere (keep reading). Again, preferences are totally subjective so I encourage you to try a trial class.
Mommy Connections
If you are looking for mommy and baby programs, Mommy Connections is probably at the top of your search list as it keeps coming up, but the description doesn't really tell you much. This is another group that I took a trial class for. The location was convenient for me, but this is pretty much like a Tupperware party for moms. A group of moms get together and then they try to sell you a bunch of stuff. If you are into that, they have great coupons, and it's a good way to learn about other things you can sign up for, such as food delivery or baby sign language. I didn't find that the things they were trying to sell were worth the money, even with the coupons, but if money isn't an obstacle for you, there are some pretty cool things that are shared in the group.
Creative Brain Dance
Okay, so I'm going to acknowledge that the concept of Creative Brain Dance at the Ontario School of Ballet sounds really hokey. It's a ballet class for babies starting 6 months old, where they learn about movement and music. If you read the description, there's a bunch of stuff about energy and brain development, and I don't know if it's necessarily true. What I do know is that my baby *loved* this class. There are songs and rhymes, and depending on the age of your baby, you help them get into positions, or you dance around with them, and you teach concepts such as rhythm and flow. Sometimes you play with props such as scarves, shakers, milk cartons, and blankets. As a caregiver, you will also have to dance around (although this is NOT a workout class), modeling for your baby. My son was always so happy to be here, and I think he learned how to get up on his hands and knees from watching some of the older kids too. If nothing else, it's a great way to expose your baby to dance, and if you know you are going to miss classes, they are extremely accommodating about pro-rating class fees.
Mommy and Baby Fitness
So this is my favourite class and I strongly encourage you to check out any of the Mommy and Baby Fitness classes available. A friend recommended this to me, and you can start taking stroller fit once your baby is 6 weeks old. What sets this apart from other mommy and baby workout classes is that it's very circuit based, so you can choose how intense you want your workout to be, and it's easy to pause and tend to your baby as needed. Even better, the last half hour is 100% dedicated to your baby. There's a parachute that comes out and you do songs and rhymes with your baby, and you even get a songbook to take home. I love this because it makes me feel less guilty as a mom. To be clear, I think it is perfectly acceptable to do something that is just for you, because we all know that your whole world revolves around your baby most of the time. For me, personally, I felt guilty taking that time for myself, but being part of this group helped me to feel good about myself and also socialize my baby, so I wasn't worried that he was bored while I was working out. I also took the aqua play class, which is both a workout for mommy and swimming lessons for baby. You get so much more attention and instruction on how to get your baby to swim, and the water is shallow and heated. If you miss any of the classes, the makeup policy is very generous, as you can go to any other class at any other location to make it up, whether it's stroller fit, aqua play, boot camp, yoga, etc. Also, the instructor checks you for diastasis recti, which is something that apparently not all doctors check for (sometimes your abs separate while you are pregnant - fun times), and if you have it, the workout is modified for you accordingly. It really helped me get back in shape and feel re-energized, and I can't say enough about how much I loved this program.
Baby Hoots
Wholeplay's Baby Hoots program is probably the other program at the top of your search engine's list besides Mommy Connections. A friend actually recommended this to me, so I took a trial class. It starts with half an hour of songs, dances, and rhymes, complete with a ukulele, and then is followed by half an hour of parent discussion about specific topics such as safety, sleep training, and introducing solids. Conceptually, this seems like a great class, and I can see why my friend enjoyed it so much. It felt a little too folksy for me, and I don't know if it was the location or the ukulele or just something in the air, but my son was not having it. I don't think there is any other program I've taken him to where he was just downright miserable. Given that Toronto Public Health covers most of the same topics in their free programs, I don't feel that I missed out by not attending the rest of the classes, but if you take a trial class, you can find out for yourself if this is something your baby might like.
Mom and Baby Reformer
Body Harmonics offers prenatal and post-natal Pilates classes, which are actually done on reformers. I had only ever done Pilates on a yoga mat prior to attending a free trial class with a friend. I actually managed to get two classes out of this at two drastically different times. The first time I went, my son was very young, and somehow, the majority of the class also seemed to have young babies. People brought their strollers into the studio, and we were given instructions on how to use the Pilates machine while the instructor walked around to each stroller, pushing them back and forth if the baby was fussing or replacing a pacifier that had fallen out. I really did not like this - I don't like having my baby confined to the stroller the whole time with a pacifier to shut him up, as I would prefer him to have some tummy time if we are not moving with the strollers. The second time I came, my son was older and more mobile and they actually had a blanket in the middle of the room with cushions so people could place their babies there. I wish they had done this the first time as it is a vastly superior setup; however, because the workout is done on the reformers, you can't tend to a mobile baby. Luckily, the instructor did a great job corralling the mobile babies to keep them away from the reformers, but realistically, the place is not baby proof and my son was getting upset about constantly being pulled away from his mom. Since everyone is working out on their own machine, I also didn't feel that I made any connections with any of the other moms. If you like reformer Pilates, this is a great class to continue to do that, but if you are like me and would prefer your workout to be machine-free, you can skip this one.
----------
Whew! That was a long blog post. Hopefully that was a bit helpful for all the parents, whether you are a stay-at-home parent or a working parent on leave. After this, back to our regularly scheduled programming!
No comments:
Post a Comment